Top 5 Favorite Chucky Murders

Well as this is coincidently my 50th post (yes I counted), I’ve decided to try something new. If I’m going to start anywhere, it might as well be one of these “top 5” posts that I sometimes read here. So I’m pretty much just trying to pick out what my title implies without sounding too frisky. Simple and straight to the point right?

As Chucky is one of the best serial killers and my personal favorite character in the horror genre, I’ve decided to count down what I see as his top 5 murders.

#5: Phil Simpson

Remember how Andy could never get anyone to believe that Chucky was alive? Well usually someone would realize the truth behind that until it was too late. Phil was obviously no exception and Chucky delivers a humorous punch line just to top it all off.

#4: Colonel Cochrane

Now this is kind of tricky. Chucky never actually kills this victim but rather faces a disappointing circumstance, at least in his view. I guess Chucky enjoys murder so much up to the point, that if a potential victim just dies in front of him due to a heart attack before Chucky can even lay a scratch, well then that must really be a letdown for him. Oh well, there’s always more victims right around the corner.

#3: Britney Spears

What a role model he is. If Chucky is going to have a boys night out with his son, he’ll make sure there’s plenty of adventure. Even after a conversation about quitting murder with his wife Tiffany, Chucky once again found himself in circumstances that eventually “forced” him to relapse. And just imagine. To have a celebrity for a victim must’ve been like getting an X-Box achievement for Chucky. 50 points maybe. Ha…

#2: The Military Barber

Not to sound pretentious but this was pretty much downright hilarious in my view. Even after committing a murder, Chucky still has the audacity to not get rid of the evidence, but rather scare it off. So by simply saying “boo,” I think Chucky pulled off a sensational and hilarious irony, where he didn’t have to commit murder but rather let the terrified Whitehurst sprint away with the recurring image of a doll having just killed the barber that cut his hair.

#1: Miss Kettewell

As a kid we dread the idea of coming to school where we have to listen to teachers, do homework, and basically just procrastinate our lives and schoolwork. What could be worse? Maybe a killer doll ready to torture you senseless. In a sense this scene really still creeps me out sometimes. Alas, we see Chucky savagely beat the living hell out of our poor Miss Kettlewell with a ruler. It’s not even that much of a “creative” murder, but in a sense I’ve always thought of this as the creepiest murder he’s ever committed. Maybe it’s the music. Maybe it’s the way Chucky evilly delivers his line “You’ve been very naughty Miss Kettlewell.” Maybe it’s the fact that this occurs right in a kindergarden classroom. I can’t put my finger on it, but alas, the image of a doll walking towards you with the fullest intention of murder, will always stick in my head for some reason. You disagree? Take a look…